Call It Courage
I became aware of something today that I had not noticed before. I was wandering through the riverside woods for my usual early morning walk with Sofie, enjoying the peaceful quiet of the forest near my home. I was reflecting on how I have much less tendency to be hyper-vigilant when in the outdoors than I used to, more able just to relax and be present to the good stuff around me. This is due in no small part to having been through a pretty intense course of treatment for PTSD called Prolonged Exposure (immersion therapy) some years ago, with the great skill and support of a VA psychologist. As you might imagine, I was grateful for the healing path and the continued growth that has developed in me since then. But I was also aware of a resurging feeling of tension, of apprehension, and of an expectation that some really bad things were about to happen.
So I asked myself, since there was no one there to talk to except Sofie, where is this coming from? If I’m not just reverting to my previous combat induced psychological states, why am I once again tense, focused, and preparing for the worst? Was I just being “triggered” back into my old survival defenses, or was this about something else? And then it dawned on me, the obvious source of my renewed vigilance that perhaps you are aware of in yourself: The American people have recently experienced threat levels we have not seen in half a century. A worldwide pandemic followed by major political upheaval have deprived us somewhat of the security and stability we need. You and I and those we love and the well-being of our country seem to be at risk.
Some of our leaders are either conflicted or in denial about the seriousness of those threats. Some segments of our society feel like they were being overrun by unwanted change; others, especially the working poor, are facing dire circumstances without adequate supplies or reinforcements; the future appears unsure and the outcome unknown. I am referring first, of course, to the impact of the COVID-19 pandemic that has traumatized and disrupted our nation. While the worst of the pandemic is over, equally serious threats are also present in the level of our political and social upheaval, in the constant threat of cyberattack or military conflict, and in the growing distrust of our countrymen, in our institutions, our “leaders”, and in each other. So I thought through what being a veteran meant to me in all this threat and loss, and I decided to pass on what I learned in case you might find it helpful.
Unlike many American citizens, we understand some things from our military training and experience that can help us all get through a pandemic, an economic crisis, and other times of trial. Whether you were ever deployed, in harm’s way, or in active combat, and no matter in which branch of our military you served, you learned some important skills and principles that are needed by our people. You have experience at taking on difficult tasks, on working with teammates to get the job done while trying to ensure everyone’s safety, and on doing your best without certainty of the outcome. You also learned that it’s not about Me, it’s about Us, and that our collective survival and victory depends on everyone doing their part, whether or not they are praised or publicly rewarded.
We know what it is to be committed to the task and to each other, what it means to look out for the wounded and helpless, and how not to be overwhelmed by what might crumble others. We have each faced loneliness, fear, and uncertainty, and most of us are convinced that we would not have made it without each other. That’s what we know that we can bring to our people, to help them get through the long, dark nights that sometimes come to our nation.
Here are some recommendations from Doc to help you help others when you can:
First, regarding COVID and other pathogens we have yet to face, make good decisions about helping to control the spread of any communicable disease. Think about this as an infantry patrol analogy…..we don’t bunch up on patrol, especially when the threat of attack is imminent, but maintain a good distance in case of incoming or ambush. However, we don’t get too separated, either; keep visual contact with your troops. Yes, we must sometimes limit contact with others (social distancing), but we should avoid isolation. It’s not good for us, and it’s no help to those who need us. Especially, reach out to those who might need to hear from you, even if it’s just to be supportive and encouraging.
Second, when devastating events come to our population, whatever they might be, do your best to be calm and reassuring, but avoid rationalizing or minimizing the severity of the situation. It is because we can name the hard truth that we can also be strong for our citizens. Two things are evident in this case: 1) We cannot respond effectively to a threat we deny exists, and 2) Great leaders in harm’s way do not panic or become hysterical.
Third, take care of yourself so you can be useful in caring for your neighbor. This is no time to be drinking to excess, or to start smoking again, or using drugs to cope, or to be restlessly and aimlessly roaming the night. While those of us with PTSD symptoms are at greatest risk for “coping” in the wrong ways, it can happen to anyone. Now is a good time to check those behaviors, both for ourselves and for those who need us to be there for them.
Finally, stay aware. Try to find news reporting that is factual and accurate so you will know what is happening in your state, in your country, and globally. Political infighting is part of our collective problem, and it’s not very beneficial to unit (or national) cohesion. Rather than debate whose fault it is, be a part of the solution by working with others to take care of our own neighborhoods, families, and community. Remember, the strength of character and commitment in the face of adversity that you gained through military service are much needed by the majority who are not veterans. When life is on the line, the calm wisdom of those who have been there can be a significant source of hope for our people.
Things To Wonder About:
- What did you learn, experience or become in the military that could help you in a time of crisis? Think about knowledge, skills, and perspectives that you could share with others.
- If you could change one thing about society to help resolve our conflicts, what would it be? Why that thing?
- If you could change one thing about yourself that would make your life more peaceful, what would it be?